One of the callers on this week’s Savage Lovecast was asking about whether or not legalizing same sex marriage could threaten the tax exempt status of churches who refuse to officiate the ceremony. Dan’s answer was right on, it won’t. The caller couldn’t find much online on the topic, so I figure I’ll add a little more information for Google to index.

Churches and pastors have the legal right to determine who they will or will not marry. For example, Mormons will only do their temple sealings for members of high enough standing that they have their temple cards, Adventist pastors aren’t supposed to perform a wedding of an Adventist and a non-Adventist, and I’m sure few pastors would be willing to knowingly marry a Christian and an atheist, even if there was no denominational policy against it. Even in states where same sex marriage is legal, churches who will only marry church members in good standing and wouldn’t consider a practicing homosexual to be a member in good standing would have nothing to worry about. Besides, who would want to be married by someone who preaches about how the happy couple will burn in hell?

However, as was demonstrated with the IRS threat to remove the Mormon church’s tax exempt status over institutional racism in the 1970s, there is a very slim chance that when anti-GLBT bigotry becomes viewed as being on par with racism that churches that demonstrate this bigotry could loose their tax exempt status, but that would have to do with membership standards and employment decisions, not who they’ll marry. In the larger scope of things, I would bet that there would be an push for gender equality first. Considering how many churches either do not allow women into paid ministry and how many that do but don’t consider them to be equal, churches have nothing to worry about when it comes to same sex marriage.

Of course, pastors aren’t the only ones who perform marriages. Generally so can judges, mayors, county and city clerks, governors, and other officials. In those cases, especially when it comes to official for whom it’s a major part of their duties, as officials of the state they do not have the right to discriminate. They would no more have the right to deny a same sex couple a legal marriage than they would a couple where one is an atheist and the other is a Christian.

The best way to calm all these fears, even better than facts, would be to separate civil unions from marriages. Make it so that civil unions are the legal institution for anyone, gay or straight, and marriages are a private ceremony of no legal significance. That would completely negate the religious arguments.