Those crazy geeks are looking forward to the zombie apocalypse, but don’t they know it already happened in Jerusalem almost 2000 years ago?
The tombs also were opened. And many bodies of the saints who had fallen asleep were raised, and coming out of the tombs after his resurrection they went into the holy city and appeared to many. (Matt 27:52-53)
There’s some interesting points with this, these verses are in the context of the earthquake that allegedly took place when the alleged man Jesus allegedly died. So, Jesus dies, there’s an earthquake that breaks open the tombs and the dead rise, all on Friday afternoon around 3:00 pm. They then wait in their tombs until the zombie hoard is unleashed on the city Sunday morning. I can imagine that after being dead for a few centuries one might be a little groggy, but to need 36 hours before they roam the city in search of brains, that’s just crazy.
Could you imagine the fright that would over take the city when zombie grandpas and grandmas comes knocking on the door, eager to feed on human flesh?
It’s not surprising that out of the four canonical gospels, only Matthew embellishes the growing legend with this bit of extra fantasy. If this had been a real event, you better believe that zombies being unleashed on the city would have been worthy of being mentioned by Mark, Luke, and John. I’m also sure that Josephus would have included this detail in his Antiquities of the Jews.
Even though this is only one of three details in the gospels that attempt to tie the legend to historical events, there is no secular corroboration for a multitude of the undead, Harrod slaughtering all the baby boys in Bethlehem, or the very unusual census that Luke describes. Now, what if the dead who where raised were the children Harrod off’d? What would be creepier than a hoard of zombie babies?
It’s almost as if maybe Matthew was intentionally trying to go over the top, it almost makes me wonder if it was actually poe that’s unfortunately been taken seriously for a few centuries too long.
Happy Zombie Day everyone!
