There’s nothing wrong with being single

6

Over the last few months I have had just about every woman in my life express concern about the fact that I am single. This is coming from friends, family, and coworkers. Here’s just a few examples:

  • On the way to my family reunion my niece asked me if I was ever going to get married.
  • The next day one of my cousins’ kids asked me if I had any kids and when I told her that I didn’t she wanted to know why.
  • A couple of weeks later one of the girls at work asked me if I was ever going to get married and why I was single, then another woman heard that question and jumped right in.
  • Another coworker asked me if I had any prospects.
  • Yet another was trying to figure out if there was anyone she could set me up with.
  • After Beer Fest one of my friends spent quite a bit of time drunkenly trying to figure out why I was single.

I’m sure none of you care, but I’m OK with being single.

Sure, it would be nice to have a girlfriend, but there is nothing wrong with being single. I am in no position to be in a serious relationship right now. I’ve only been free of religion for four years and while I think I’ve done a pretty good job of figuring out who I am, another year wouldn’t hurt. In those four years I have moved three times for work and there’s a good chance that I will soon move again. There are times when keeping life nice and simple is a good thing. Now is probably a good one.

I’ve been in relationships that had a net result of making me less happy, and that’s not including the breakup. The one I’m thinking of made me down right miserable and I was fortunate that it didn’t last more than a couple months. I have learned that while a certain amount of settling is required, settling too much just because your lonely or horny is just not worth it.

I’ve done long distance and that sucked. I’ve also had to say goodbye to someone with whom romance was budding because it was time for me to move and we had agreed that we would not do long distance. If I were to get a girlfriend right now and then have to move in three months I would be looking at long distance again or having another horrible goodbye before the relationship had run its course. For the right person trying long distance would be worth it, but only if it was a temporary situation.

I also know that the longer I wait to get into a serious relationship the less likely I would be to make a mistake. Believe it or not, I can be patient.

So, to the women in my life: unless you have the skeptic of my dreams to set me up with, just leave it alone.

6 Comments


  1. This might be somewhat off topic (seriously…it ties in when I thought of it….), but have you ever thought of going to grad school in the basic sciences?


  2. When I've thought about going back to grad school I've leaned towards law, philosophy, or history so as to not have so many remedial courses that I'd have to take. I love science and would enjoy getting into it, but no I haven't looked into how much extra work it would take considering my current educational background.


  3. There would be some ground to make up.  If you wanted to go that route, perhaps try a small school where a master's is there terminal degree, and see if you can take some remedial classes while you are there. (what science classes did you take during your undergrad?) 
    This is what I would see as being to big fringe benefits for you if you were to try the basic sciences:
    1) Your tuition is virtually always covered by a teaching assistantship, and you get a stipend on top of that, and
    2) You will be in a large, active community of like-minded skeptics.

    I have seen people go from unrelated undergrad majors to a grad program in biology before, although it is pretty rare.  It can be done.


  4. I only took two quarters of Astronomy.


  5. yeah..that is going to be a tough uphill on that one.  You will likely need a year of Intro Chem, Intro Bio, and Intro Physics at the most bare minimum, then likely a few minimum upper division bio: Genetics, Ecology, Biostats, maybe one or two more.  It could be possible to get it all done over a 12-month period of one was dedicated.


  6. That's what I thought. I know management isn't the best fit for me, I just need to figure out what would be.

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